If there were one practice that was almost guaranteed to put us on the pathway to peace, I think non-attachment might just be it. Non-attachment, also known as vairagya in Sanskrit, or understood as ‘renunciation’ in Buddhism, is one of the key aspects of many spiritual, religious and secular practices designed to lead to a more peaceful way of living. The well- known Hindu text the Bhagavad Gita features non-attachment as one of its central tenants, revealing; “The secret of human freedom, is to act well, without attachment to the results”. If you often find yourself in a state of anxiety or worry about the future; if you put way too much pressure on yourself to be ‘perfect’; if you agonise about your future and what it might look like financially, romantically, professionally or in any other form, write that down and look at it often…
Upon taking the first few steps on the journey of yoga, whether physical, philosophical or with a meditation practice, sooner or later the subject of non-attachment will likely come along. On 200hr yoga teacher training courses, the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali are often prescribed as reading and reflection, and within its many threads and verses, is vairagya, ‘letting go, acceptance and detachment’. To practice this attitude whilst still living an engaged and socially active life is – as texts spanning Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, and many completely non-spiritual sectors will say – the way to find peace in the world today. In some shape or form, it’s likely you’re attached to something right now; whether it’s the outcome of a job interview, a relationship, your physical appearance or body size, your social status, your job, your material possessions, or the diet you’re currently following. Whatever it may be, it’s likely that the feeling of being attached leads to worry or frustration, as attachment essentially boils down to doing the impossible; trying to control things we have absolutely no control over, and doing it all out of fear.
Learning To Let Go
In the Bhagavad Gita, as Krishna and Arjuna stand on the metaphorical battlefield of Kurukshetra, Krishna expounds; “While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for them, and from such attachment lust develops, and from lust anger arises. From anger, complete delusion arises, and from delusion bewilderment of memory. When memory is bewildered, intelligence is lost, and when intelligence is lost one falls down again into the material pool. But a person free from all attachment and aversion and able to control his senses through regulative principles of freedom can obtain the complete mercy of the Lord”. To put it very simply; when we experience something we like, we tend to want more of it, and in a very short amount of time, we become attached and fearful of what might happen if that thing / person / experience disappears. We experience ‘bewilderment of memory’ in the sense that we forget how to be our true selves, unattached and as curios and free as a child, and we ‘fall into the material pool’ by becoming trapped in a way of living that keeps us attached to material possessions, money or the opinions of others. This attachment and underlying fear creates suffering, and ultimately prevents us from becoming our highest, truest selves. Imagine being totally accepting of life’s circumstances, unphased by unpredictability, comfortable in the discomfort of uncertainty, detached from the outcome of a situation, or being able to let go of negative habits and thought patterns. How freeing would that be? Indeed, being attached to something or someone means we’re constantly trying to control certain aspects of life, gripping a little too tightly and preventing life from being the naturally ever-changing and spontaneous journey it’s meant to be. When we’re attached, those things we’re attached to tend to ‘own’ us, stopping us from being who we truly are or could be. Pause here for a moment and consider, what are you ‘attached’ to? Is it limiting you or preventing you from being at peace? What would happen if you let go a little? Non-attachment is a life-long practice, but at a time in which the world we’re living in is ever more unpredictable, now is a pretty good time to start. Here’s a three-step process to start letting go and finding more peace:
1. Become Aware:
Very often, we’re so deeply attached to certain things that we can’t even see it. The first step requires making no changes whatsoever, simply observe and think about the things in your life you’re attached to or try to control too much. Is it the way you look? Is it your relationships? Is it your routine? It is the identity you’ve formed around your diet? Is it your job?
2. Listen To Your Body:
The next step involves a willingness to perhaps face some discomfort. Start thinking about how you’d feel if the things you’re attached to changed or disappeared. What sensations arise? Fear? Anxiety? Anger? The more pronounced your reaction to it, the more likely it is you’re attached and that the object / identity / appearance is trapping you. In other words, you don’t own it, it owns you.
3. Take The First Step:
Now you know what you’re attached to and how your body reacts to it, practice letting go. Choose something you can work with for a few days – it might be that you’re waiting to hear about a job opportunity, or you’ve realised the way you’re living isn’t what feels authentic to you but are scared to make changes. Whatever it is – as cliché as this might sound – breathe into it and sit with it. Relax your body, know that there’s more to life than the rigid rules you might have set for yourself, and that the more you detach, the less you’ll be controlled and fearful. You’ll be free to dive into the ever-changing spontaneity of life, and you’ll unleash your true power and potential. As Ekhart Tolle once said: “Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on”.